So, my lovelies, as I'm sure you read from the last post, I got a callback for A Midsummer Night's Dream.
First of all, I'd just like to say how scary it is that I'm adjusting to auditioning as well as I am. Third audition in, I've got a minor part in a little play thing (it's awesome and perfect to give me hope because I'll never forget that first part) and a callback for a much, much bigger one. First audition, terrified out of my wits and I flopped miserably. Second audition, I didn't give myself time to be nervous and cold reads will probably be the way to go for me, at least for a little bit until I get used to it. Third audition, Shakespearean comedic monologue which I picked from Twelfth Night. That's the one you might remember from a few posts back that means something to me because of my sister. Go check that post out. It was awesome and I'm not just saying that because I wrote the post.
I would just like to admit here since I haven't admitted it to anyone yet, I was mimicking the style of one of the actresses from the London company that was here for Much Ado About Nothing for a couple of the lines. I didn't even realize I was doing it, until I heard her voice repeat the monologue I did for the first audition in my head. After that, I was trying to put more me into it. It might have worked. It might not have. But whatever I did, it was enough to get me a callback and now I need to figure out what I did so I can mimic it. Obviously, they liked what I did, so I need to...essentially mimic myself almost mimicking someone else. Wow... Chaos.
Anyway, Midsummer Night's Dream is done by the touring company here at BYU and is one of the official plays here. In fact, it's one of the plays that is $2 with the freshman arts card thing. That's how big it is. And I think they're doing the tours for the elementary schools in the area. Have I mentioned how I am terrified of children under the age of five? Three is borderline freak-out. Five is manageable but still super wigged. Also, do you know how good that will look on a resume? Seriously, I get a part in this production and that is getting added to my resume faster than you can say "a flibberty gibbet, a will-o-the-wisp, a clown". It's completely legit. I'm also hoping to do an audition for a student film tomorrow night and I'll do it as late as possible after the callbacks so I just need to brush up on my a) monologues from Audition 1, b) my lines for The Alchemist, and c) the tips I've picked up about callbacks.
And there's a new episode of Z Nation tomorrow night (super excited but super sad at the same time). Saturday, I've got rehearsals for Alchemist. I have a paper due on Monday on Waiting for Godot. I'll have Chem homework for Saturday. Studying for history and getting the notes from my friend. Also, I have to get around to doing visiting teaching for relief society because the month is over next week and...that's bad. But good because that means I turn 19 in less than two weeks. Mission age. ...And still no desire. Okay, well then, back to whatever this post is...
If it sounds like I've got a thousand things going on at once, I do. Or at least it feels like it. But as opposed to school work, which drowns me, this feels like a challenge and I do love a challenge. Besides, I'm on a deadline here. If I want to have the possibility of being in Z Nation, which got renewed for another season and I might have a shot at it, then I need to get an agent. If I can get an agent (I also read up that you don't want to put everything you've ever been in on the resume so if I have only a couple of things and one or two of them is filmed, I'll be golden) (I'm also super friendly and charming on the first meeting most of the time, especially when it's important like this), then I can request to have the ear put down for anything remotely related to Z Nation.
I flip between wondering what the heck I'm doing and feeling completely sure that I can do this. This is terrifying. I'm not sure I can express just how terrifying it is because I'm trying to not focus on this. I cannot let fear distract me. Because I'm leaving my comfort zone far, far behind and some days, I wonder why I'm doing that. Then I remember that I don't want to settle and I don't want to just be okay, and I don't want to survive. I want to live.
Living entails taking risks and, baby, I'm from Vegas. Sort of. It's gambler's paradise there. I've done the big city. I've done the small city. I was born in a college town and spent the important years (the ones that helped to super shape my personality) on a farm. I'm as well rounded in that respect as a person needs.
Bring. It. On. Because I will rise to the challenge.
To everyone who is reading this, thank you. You all rock. No, really. You are amazing individuals and I like having you guys here. I don't know if you actually care or you just find me amusing or you want to watch me crash and burn or you actually want me to succeed, and I'm not getting anything, but I enjoy knowing that for whatever reason, people are reading this. Seriously, I'm easy to find. Twitter, I'm @brookeaharding. I'm on Tumblr (which may actually be linked to my Twitter account, I'd have to check to be certain). I'm on Instagram even though I don't do much with it. I'm on Facebook. Send me a DM (or whatever that term is) or tweet at me and tell me stuff. It doesn't even have to be remotely related to this blog. Just say something like "The sky is purple and the words are great". And then tell me about your day or your week. Or just whatever. I want to interact with you guys. If you guys don't feel comfortable, that's fine. Trust me, I get it.
But for now, adieu because the sun has gone to bed and so must I. And I leave you with the beautiful sounds of Julie Andrews' voice:
I Have Confidence
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