No News is Good News

Well. When I get news, y'all will be the second to know. The first is Anayetzy only because I know she doesn't read this and I thought she'd like to know the results of the audition.
I'll let you guys know as soon as I get the information.
I'm excited about this too.

When I was human I had to eat constantly. It was kind of annoying.

So I'm pretty sure that that was one of the best experiences I've ever had. And that's including the workshop we did with a couple of the British actors in theatre yesterday. Which had me mentally freaking out because we did the thing from Midnight. I don't like mimicking. And I really don't like trying to say the same thing at the same time as someone else. Although I see what David Tennant meant when he said he really enjoyed it because it was like doing a theatre exercise and he loved being in his roots like that. I get it now because I would have enjoyed it immensely...IF I HADN'T BEEN SCARRED FOR LIFE BECAUSE OF MIDNIGHT!!!!
So it was probably off the high of adrenaline and excitement and Britishness that made me sign up to audition today. But I can't find myself an excuse because it. Was. AWESOME! Completely night and day from the other one. Last time I was so nervous I wasn't eating. This time, I was so busy I didn't have time to eat but the flip side was I didn't have the chance to get nervous. So I was warm and friendly and all smiles with some laughs thrown in. I genuinely enjoyed it this time. Whatever the formula was, it worked. Again, I don't mind if I don't get a part. I probably won't. But I want to work with this miniplay so that I can get used to working in that setting. I want to learn. I want to learn how to work as this team because my theatre class is the best. I'm just loving the people in it. And it's a different love for what I have in my soc class. That is the introvert who loves studying people that loves that class. The extrovert is diving into my theatre class wholeheartedly. Not so much a fan of writing plays but that is okay. I'm not the type to come up with the plans. Point me in a direction and let me do my thing because I am a force of nature like a...a...hurricane. Or maybe a tornado. I dunno. Whatever. Just let me do my thing because I have incredible energy and focus for short periods of time, which is why theatre will be good for me. I won't be able to do the same thing over and over and over and over. That burns me out and I start lashing out because I feel bored and restless and unfulfilled. I'm constantly doing and learning new things in theatre. And because I have that outlet, I can handle better the monotony of my other classes.

Which is weird because you'd think I'd like labs then because of the doing element. But no. For whatever reason, Chemistry and Biology are two areas where I'd rather be the archaeologist than the astronaut.

Anyway, there's the audition report for this one. I LOVE YOU ALL AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A FABULOUS DAY!!! Until next time!!

Bait the hook well, this fish will bite.

Two posts in one day. I feel like it's a new record. Whatever.

I just did something totally insane. Something totally, stupidly, wonderfully insane and I am just thrilled. I signed up to audition for...something tomorrow after one of my classes gets out. Oh, my gosh. I'm doing a cold read because after the debacle of the monologues (practice makes more comfortable), I'm going to rely on the equivalent of sight reading which I'm actually really good at.
I don't even know what I'm auditioning for. I'm the first auditioner (auditionee?) tomorrow and actually of the auditions. Gulp. Not sure what I was thinking but there it is. It was completely insane and what's funny is I almost didn't look at the board on the way out. But that lovely little voice nudged me and said go look. So I did and on one of those crazy impulses from my ESTP personality (the INFP wouldn't have the nerve), I signed up.
And part of it could be that I was coming off a high of performance from my theatre class and I was over the moon about the fact that I had just spent a bunch of time around a pair of British actors who are here to do Much Ado About Nothing (remember that one? I did a monologue from that play last audition).
I'm insane. But it's gambling time and while I may be a practical Idahoan girl at heart, I have Vegas that bled into her. And nobody can gamble like Vegas.

This isn't a question of what I'm not. It's a question of who I could be.

Hi, friends! It's been a while. I haven't been doing much other than waiting for Friday nights so that I can watch Z Nation and so that it's the end of the week (which means Doctor Who!!!!!). And I've been watching a lot of Supernatural because every time I walk out of my Book of Mormon class, I've got Supernatural on the mind. Especially when we start talking about Lucifer and the War in Heaven and why he fell. Yeah... I just got to Season 3 again and for the first time (probably because I was emotionally stiffer than, well, a 2x4 the first twelve times I watched that finale), I actually cried at the end of Season 2. Poor Dean...

That wasn't actually what I wanted to talk about today. I want to talk about Marvel. Specifically the Marvel Cinematic Universe. From what I've seen from the internet, a growing number of fans are clamoring for Black Panther to get his own movie. And that's perfectly fine with me. I love Marvel and I know I'll love pretty much any movie they do. I also love the X-Men which is why I'm pretty much praying that Fox at least lets Marvel borrow the rights so that we can have an Avengers, X-Men team up because I know that happened frequently in the comic books. :D

No, but seriously, I've noticed a lot of fans beginning to clamor for a female superhero stand-alone movie. And I read an article online that made me shriek with excitement. On the inside, of course. I was eating breakfast around people and I was not in my dorm room where I could do so in privacy. But the female superhero that the writer of the article suggested is my absolute favorite superhero. Forget Magneto, Wolverine, Wonder Woman, Cat Woman, and Captain America. I love them to pieces, I really do. But there is one who takes the cake beyond any other character of a comic book movie or TV show and that is Carol Danvers, AKA Ms. Marvel AKA Binary AKA Captain Marvel. She is my baby. She has a beautifully rich backstory and a complicated as hell storyline, both elements that Marvel seems to do well with AND she would be able to help stand as another bridge between Earth and Space storylines. She can also be the badass secret agent with the warm, compassionate thing people want from females. She can do both. Not only that, but she was present in Age of Apocalypse (the new X-Men that should be coming out eventually) and Age of Ultron (the Avengers sequel) so she could in theory if Fox decides to play nice help bridge the two with Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch who are in the Marvel Cinematic Universe if I recall correctly from Thor 2. Quicksilver was also in the most recent X-Men (Days of Future Past which was FABULOUS AND AMAZING AND I WANT IT TO COME OUT ON DVD ALREADY!!!). She also could be a member of S.H.I.E.L.D. since she was for a time without her powers. So Ms. Marvel could in theory be a very strong game piece and a game changer for Marvel Studios, if they're paying attention and do it right. They're bringing out Ant Man and Doctor Strange, the latter may become the equivalent of Iron Man in terms of fan popularity if Marvel's plan works like they hope. Is it really so far fetched that Ms. Marvel could be on their tails? There are so many ways that they could tie her in to what has already been established. But the reason for this fantasticness that is my soul right now is I've always wanted to be in a Marvel movie and no one can blame me for wanting to be a star because the extroverted part of my personality is all about the limelight and prancing around on stage. If that happens, that Carol is getting her own movie or is going to be introduced in someone else's movie, I hope that I'm available to audition for that. I love that character and I would absolutely love to portray her. If I don't, the world won't end. But I want that opportunity.

Hope and faith. It's what I run on, along with a heavy dose of hard work because life isn't just going to be handed to me on a silver platter.

You died a failure because you didn't try.

I'm sure you're all anxiously awaiting for my news. Hah, I doubt that. But it does feel good to be able to write about something I have done, rather than something I will do or a weird story or whatever I've been writing about. Strangely satisfying.
Okay, so that was the most terrifying thing I've ever experienced in my life. Well, no, watching my friend bleed from her head was pretty terrifying. And so was getting trapped in an elevator and having to go near them all the time. And the first time I performed on stage. That was choir, but I was so nervous, I actually made myself sick. It was probably just a cold but it was a stress cold, which in my experience are the worst kind. And the Weeping Angels...
Let me amend that statement to one of the most terrifying things I'e ever experienced in my life. I'm a big fan of eating. Always have been, probably always will be except when I'm extremely stressed, in which case I don't eat and I don't feel hungry. I should have recognized the signs, to be blatantly honest but I haven't been that stressed in like a year and I tend to forget things in the past because I can't change them so there's no point in dwelling.
Although the dude at the desk was super nice and totally helped calm my nerves a little. He told me about this movie with Robert Downey Jr and I won't repeat it because I don't remember most of it. But I do remember the highly inspirational thing that was at the end of that little pep talk. "'You died a failure because you didn't try.' Don't be like Harrison."
That really does sum up my greatest fear. It would be so easy to go through life without trying. People do it every day.
Sorry, I'm supposed to be talking about the audition. I'm really tired and absolutely starving but I'm waiting until lunch to go eat so that I can digest during my freshman seminar class.
WOW, I can't stay on topic. Anyway, the whole audition is kind of a blur except for messing up one of the lines of the Shakespeare and two of the CSI Neverland. I did have them chuckling at the end of Neverland 911, so I feel vaguely accomplished. But I was so nervous and it must have shown on my face. And instead of answering honestly about how I was, I had a momentary snap at the honest voice because you NEVER SAY HOW NERVOUS YOU ARE, I answered with a smile that I was actually pretty good although I may forget a line or two. Also a booboo and I knew it at the time, but that's okay. I want to get more comfortable with auditioning before I actually get a role so if I killed any chance of getting a role in "See How They Run", it may or may not have been accidental. But once I started talking, there were a few moments here and there where I had to frantically flip through my mental files, but other than that I wasn't nervous and it was okay. Until I stopped. I walked out and immediately burst into the hysterical laughter that happens when I come down off an adrenaline high. The other auditionees (is that even a word????) looked at me like I'd lost my mind and grown a third head and Scott Savage (the dude at the desk with a total superhero name and I told him so) said "See? You're laughing. It wasn't that bad." I paused and said "At least I'm not crying from relief. Laughing is much more therapeutic." He chuckled at that. So I'm well aware that I won't be getting a part. And that's okay. Because it's like tennis. (Tom Hiddleston is fabulous because he also is way into tennis and compares acting to it. Bless him.) When I first started playing tournaments, it took me what seemed like forever before I won a match. I was so nervous and inexperienced and that does affect everything, contrary to popular belief. Auditioning is like that. You can't win the tournament (get the lead role) until you can win the first match (auditioning). Each match after that is a smaller role that leads up into the big one. You can't just jump into winning tournaments, although some (very, very few) do. Experience and comfort. Even now, I'm less nervous and more excited about each match I play. And that's where I want to get to in auditioning.

...You know... I may not be playing tennis as regularly as I used to, but it's something that will always be a part of me. And the lessons I've learned about life from tennis can be extrapolated to fit other activities. Which is why I know I'll be able to be less nervous. That first time is absolutely terrifying even when you don't have a prayer of winning. But you learn how to work it, how to deal, and how to thrive. I used to hate people watching me play. I love it now and high school tennis was absolutely the best thing that ever happened to me because I was the star and I had to be. Even when I wasn't in the top spot, I was still the top dog and everyone knew it. I had to become a leader and a star very quickly and learn to thrive in attention because I would get it from both my team and the other teams. I learned to love the cheering, even when it wasn't for me (with a few exceptions, but no sports team in our school liked to play those schools because they were all completely rude.) I will eventually get to that point in auditioning (I've already got the instincts, I just need the confidence) and once I do, I'll be taking the world by storm.

Neverland 911, what's the emergency?...Oh, dear! Please hold!

Well, this is it. First audition ever is tomorrow. I'm preparing two monologues, one comedic and one dramatic. One is contemporary and the other is Shakespeare. I'm trying to round things out and demonstrate that I'm awesome with all styles so that people know when I go to audition for Midsummer Night's Dream that I can handle whatever is thrown at me.

Sadly enough, I love the Shakespeare one better even though it's way more complicated. Because it actually does fit my personality very, very well and how I respond to romance. It's from Much Ado About Nothing which may sneak in as a close second after Midsummer Night's Dream after this. Simply because of Beatrice. She is like my soul animal. She's my home girl. Ya know? It's a very passionate game-changer, this monologue. And the coolest thing is that I'm feeling her emotions, the emotions of this girl who doesn't realize the consequences  of her actions until they're staring her in the face and she's slapped with reality. That sounds like everything that has ever happened to me and what it takes to get me back on the ground. I'm feeling pumped and horribly terrified but I have a good feeling about this. Not that I'm going to get the part because I'm probably not. I don't care so much about that. I just want to audition and be able to strut around on a stage for a few minutes, not as a group. Have I mentioned I like the limelight more than I let on?

My theatre teacher told us to tell the truth. He was talking about our plays that we're writing (I should probably start on that...), but it applies to this too. And Beatrice is my truth.

For the other one, it's more about pulling off bored, not concerned. Haven't quite figured out if I want to be serious and then totally laid back with an attitude for the second one or if I want to sound bored out of my mind and then with an attitude like I was talking to one of my best friends. I think that way might be funnier (according to the trailer in my head), but I dunno. Haven't decided yet. Ooh, I'm so excited. I'm more excited to just audition than anything else. Which is horribly funny because I couldn't have done it two years ago. Choir... Choir has helped. My solo that I did even though I was nearly dying and the quartet and the duets I've done... they've helped me to release the showgirl that just waits for the chance to purr.
Hopefully this can release her a bit more. If I were to meet the me from even four years ago, she would look at me like I'm completely alien. And that's okay.

"Everyone changes, when you think about it."~ The Eleventh Doctor, Doctor Who: Time of the Doctor

Well, wish me luck, peeps!!!

Salt Lake Comic Con 2014

So normally I would put something like this on the other blog but I think it would fit better here. Because...

COMIC CON!!!!!!!

My first Comic Con of many (I'm sure) and I absolutely loved it. I would say easily that that was one of the best experiences of my life so far, if not the best experience I've ever had.
Stock pile of actors I met:

Michael Welch

Now see, I was expecting to meet all the rest of those people. I was not expecting to meet him. And my reaction broadcast that. I turned bright red and had trouble forming sentences. Basically, it was the reaction I had with everyone else, but this time I was in front of him and had to at least attempt to maintain some dignity instead of being in the safety of my home where I could hyperventilate and giggle and squeal with excitement. Yeah... I couldn't do that without being labeled a loony bin. We should all be proud that I managed to hold myself together and remember my name. But Michael is such a sweetheart and I'm kinda upset that I didn't get to spend more time talking to him because he actually managed to put me at ease. But my meeting him was very special because he was my first actor I met, my first autograph, and my first picture at my first Comic Con. It doesn't hurt that he's a very lovely individual to look at too. But here's how much I loved meeting him. I hate Twilight (for a multitude of reasons, but that's not the point). And because I met him, I want to go and watch them again. :)

Craig Parker

This guy is awesome. He was the elf Haldir in The Lord of the Rings (my favorite fantasy series/serial/whatever) and I always thought Haldir was much hotter than Legolas. So let's be honest, this was a huge treat for me. He was also in Legend of the Seeker as Darken Rahl (I enjoyed it but the series trespassed too far from the books for me) (I always loved Darken Rahl too even though he was completely crazy). And he has seriously one of the best accents. He's a Kiwi (New Zealander for those who don't know that term). And I did a brief bit of research on him when I was waiting in line to take a selfie with him and my aunt. His birthday is actually a week after mine. Isn't that just fabulous!!! We had a quick chat about that because let's be honest. I love people who have birthdays near mine. (He even identified me as a Scorpio like him, so that bumped him up a bunch o points). Again, I'd have liked to talk to him longer and just chat. But he's just so cool. 

Paul McGann                    Colin Baker                     

When I found out I was going to meet them, I stopped breathing and started crying. Doctor Who has returned to me a love of life and a desire to live. IB had killed it. Doctor Who brought it back, just as it had been brought back from certain death. And I root for the underdogs in TV and movies (part of why I like villains, you know they're going to lose, so I root for them). The Sixth Doctor (Colin Baker) is one of the more generally disliked Doctors of the incarnations. And I've seen an episode and while it was probably not the best episode to introduce me to Six (it was the Two Doctors with Patrick Troughton) because Six was absolutely bonkers and even madder than Eleven was. And at the time I thought Eleven was the cream of the crop for bonkerishness. Six trumped him. So I started researching Six and I found out that he really didn't stand a chance. Doctor Who was suffering and the writers were hard on him from the start (he nearly strangled a companion and I don't care which companion or Doctor is in question, that's a big no-no). Then he had a whole season devoted to his trial, and people on trial are naturally miscreants. Not only that, but he came after the adorable, young Fifth Doctor. So my heart just ached for Colin Baker because he seriously drew the short end of the stick. Besides, he's got one of the boomiest voices ever and he reminds me so much of my grandpa. It's fantastic.

Similar situation with Paul McGann. He's so underrated that it's not even funny. The man helped keep the fandom together during the dark times. He has done so much for the fandom but all he gets video wise is The Movie and a six minute minisode. Everyone does agree that the Eighth Doctor gets his time to shine. And here's where I prove that I like Paul McGann better than Colin Baker (sorry). When I told him I loved Night of the Doctor, he laughed and was like "It's amazing how much they can pack into like six minutes". Then my aunt commented that I'd probably seen it around five dozen times (not entirely true, but whatever, I was so stunned I didn't think to correct her). Paul got this sheepish grin and leaned in towards me. "I've got a confession to make." I leaned in. "I've only seen it once." I did that weird giggle thing of disbelief and said "Seriously?" He was like "Yeah, and it was only because my son forced me to. I watched on a phone between my fingers!" At which point he lifted his hands up to show me what he meant. He laughed. "It's so weird watching yourself acting. I can't do it because I'd go mad." Absolutely lovely gentleman. With a fantastic accent. Seriously, I wish he got more credit for all the work he does for Who.

Stan Lee

Does this man need an introduction or comment? He's the father of Marvel. And I'm so honored to have met him before he died.

Stephen Amell           John Barrowman    

Last, but certainly not least. And for the record, I'm listening to John sing right now. The man has a fantastic voice. I didn't actually meet Stephen Amell. Which is okay, because I don't watch anything with him in it although I think I might have to start watching Arrow.

John Barrowman though. He made me laugh and teased me and we had to take two pictures with them because SOMEONE(...cough...John...cough...) blinked. I'm not sure I could have been any closer to the man physically. But that's okay because I think he is totally cool. And it's really telling that he chats with EVERYONE who gets near him and he photobombed people on Friday when they were taking pictures with the TARDIS. He has so much energy and he just loves his fans. I don't think I've ever seen anyone quite like him and to have met him... This won't be the only time I meet him. I know it won't.

So those are the actors I met and a quick little story with them. I also saw Eliza Dushku, Eve Myles, Giancarlo Esposito, Hulk Hogan, and Simon Helberg (IMHO, he needs to shave). I got autographs from some actresses in LA Slasher, which doesn't come out until next year but we went to the midnight showing last night. Elizabeth and Abigail. They're so cool. 

The point this is to say how much I want to be one of their number one day. LA Slasher made me flinch because of the nature of what I want to do but I figure that as long as I'm nice and I don't act super stuck up, I should be fine.

I want to be able to get to know all these brilliant people, to be able to just chat with them. I want to be the kind of person that other people look up to. I want to be able to give people an out when they need to take their minds off of the troubles of the world. I want to be able to help my family. But now that I've gotten this taste for talking to celebs, I don't think I'll ever get rid of it. I love learning about people. I really do. But most of the time I'm too shy to be the one to begin the conversation. But this really is the only thing that both the people pleaser and the peacock agree on. I want to do this. I don't want to delay it. But certain promises have been made to me as long as I make education a priority. The only problem with that is it's not specific. School education? Life education? So until I can get an answer to that question, I'll stay in school because I don't have anything better to do.

Well, let's see. It should turn out to be pretty interesting.

So I'm sure that all of you are anxiously awaiting to hear my first experience with theatre outside of fainting as Lady Macbeth in my 9th grade English class or the rendition of Les Justes (I was the poet terrorist, no idea what his name was but if I looked it up, I'd remember) from French last year.

First day of class, what happens? We were told to basically improvise a story that the prof told us and perform it in front of the rest of the class. One way to completely panic me is to tell me to come up with something on the spot. Unless I'm writing, my creative mind is not good under pressure like that. But you know...once we'd figured out what we were going to do...I was so nervous because I was one of the three "named" characters in the story. In fact, so nervous, I started giggling (not the most appropriate thing for anything ever). I was on the verge of panic.
Until I started to perform. The curious thing was that I completely forgot there was an audience. Not only was there an audience, but I'd never met these people before, I've never seen these people before, and these people have done more acting than some partial crap in a non-theatre class or setting. I was working with people I've never met or seen who have a whole sight more experience than I do. And I managed to forget there was an audience. Completely and entirely. With all those stresses that normally would send me into near-hysterics, I was completely calm. Well, I was concerned that my "son" was being horrible and ignoring me but other than that, I was calm. And then the audience started clapping and it kind of shook me out of whatever airport world my mind had taken me to. And I suddenly wasn't male anymore.
I do believe that that is the most fascinating thing that has ever happened to me. And if that was my natural response, being pretty much completely untrained in any of the theatreness stuff and being completely panicked, I can't even fathom what will happen once I get trained. I'll either get better or worse.

I guess I don't get stage fright. Wait, I knew that. Choir. Tennis. Duh. Sorry, folks, I'm a bit tired.

“One good solid hope is worth a cartload of certainties.”

And so it begins...

First day of college. And while I would normally rant about how much running around I have to do (I'll save that for the other one), I would simply like to point out that there are auditions for a play next week. I have a week to memorize two monologues, one comedic and one dramatic. Now that my computer is temporarily up and running, I'll have a chance to find good ones that I can pull off. I'll also have to do some research on the play itself, not much because I don't want to overburden myself with outside information since I have to do a thing on that play for my theatre class and having extra information would kind of be cheating. At least in my perspective, it would be. If I get a part, then there's no way that I won't be using that information because I'd have a reason to know it. And a darn good reason, too.
The play is called "See How They Run". I know absolutely nothing about it but what I do know is it's go time. Time for me to have supreme confidence in myself outwardly even though I'm absolutely terrified on the inside. 200 points is 10% of my grade. ONLY TEN PERCENT!!!!!!! Sigh... Pretty sure I've bitten off more than I can chew. But what the heck? Let's see what this ol' girl can do, shall we?

Wish me luck, internet friends!!